


Understand

by A-Writer-Writing (Anriela)



Series: To You, My first [1]
Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-04 10:36:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16345157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anriela/pseuds/A-Writer-Writing
Summary: "To my Love, whoever you may be at the time of reading this,I do not understand how to say 'I love you'."





	Understand

To my Love, whoever you may be at the time of reading this,

I do not understand how to say "I love you"  
In the way it should mean to our current relationship.  
It was always been "I love you, my brother"  
And then briefly "I love you, my best friend"  
And it is still I love you, completely.  
Even in your strongest armor, the suits you wear tailored to your skin  
And maybe I'm the only person on this earth that has never entirely seen it  
But I love you, and it, anyway, and always.  
I do not understand how to say "I love you" in the context of "I like you."  
You are the first.  
I do not understand what it means to kiss someone,  
To press my lips against yours, so soft  
And the fact that you let me even though mine are broken and bruised.  
I do not understand what "I love you" means.  
And I don't know for certain that you do, either.  
I will likely be able to show this  
To anyone but you, first.  
Perhaps so I can perfect it  
Before you ever find out it exists.  
And maybe it will hurt them to know that I have already been kissed  
A total of three times.  
All by you  
And I remember every one like it happened yesterday.  
And every one is a lifeline for me.  
I do not understand what "I love you" means,  
But I understand that it is for you  
I get out of bed,  
It is for you I ever try,  
For you I want to be beautiful,  
For you I want to give something worth loving.  
I do not understand what "I love you" means,  
I wonder if anyone does.  
I wonder if it would be better if we were doing this for the first time  
Years from now,  
As if being older will help us, help me,  
Understand better.  
I do not understand what "I love you" means.  
But I understand that, even though you have nothing right now,  
Even when your armor is three times thicker,  
And it doesn't fit quite right,  
Even when I can not help you recover as I should be,  
Even when I can not help myself recover as I should be,  
You will have me.  
Because while I do not understand what "I love you" means,  
And I don't know if I ever will,  
You are the first real one I'd like to use it for.


End file.
